You have to start somewhere, but where? A good idea is to sit down with your partner (and anyone else who is important to the decision making process) and work out what sort of wedding you want to have – big and OTT or small and intimate. If your parents are paying for the wedding it may be a good idea to include them but you may prefer to make some of the decisions first and include them at a later stage! A good idea is to make some lists of what is important to each of you – things you must have, things you would like and things that may be nice but are not important. You can even have a list of what you do not want.
Your “must have” list is where you put anything you have to have in your wedding, for example if you have always dreamed of having your wedding in a particular church this goes on the list, if there is a particular reception venue you have always dreamed of, or the flowers for your bouquet. These are the things that will determine where, when and who.
The “would like” list are things that don’t matter quite so much, for example you might think that you would like to arrive in a horse and carriage or a stretch hummer, but if it is too expensive or impractical for you ceremony location then you won’t be devastated if you don’t.
The “things that would be nice” list is for things like a butterfly release during the ceremony etc. the extras that you may like but don’t have to have.
It is important at this stage to be realistic in your wants – if you know you only have a small budget then don’t expect to have the most expensive reception centre for your wedding, you can still have a beautiful wedding.
It is also very important for both partners to be involved in the planning process. Yes it is the bride’s big day but it is also the groom’s big day and they should not be overlooked. Some grooms have been dreaming about their wedding day just as much as the bride so remember to consider both sides and sometimes a compromise is needed.
Remember, the wedding is just one day – the marriage is for life.